Just Chillin …

"But I don't want to go among mad people …"

Distorted Thinking Hook Bitten

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Oops, I did it again and bit the hook.  This time, I bit the following hooks of distorted thinking:

Disqualifying the Positive – You dismiss positive experiences by insisting they “don’t count” for some reason or other. In this way you can maintain a negative belief that is contradicted by your everyday experiences.

Jumping to conclusions – You make a negative interpretation even though there are no definite facts that convincingly support your conclusion.
  A. Mind reading. You arbitrarily conclude that someone is reacting negatively to you, and you don’t bother to check this out.

— Source: Sources of Insight – 10 Distorted Thinking Patterns

I felt the anger arise and the lashing out beginning, but I was unable to stop it.  In doing so, I really discounted a very positive and caring act, only to flip it around and conclude it as a negative act.  Additionally, while the act itself was thinking on my behalf, my distorted view flipped that on it’s side.

Ever since I have become aware of these distorted thinking patterns, I find myself time and time again falling victim to them.  After the event, I tried to do some breath counting meditation, but was unable to make it past 50 (I will usually do 100 counts in a sitting).  The reason, I was just feeling way too angry inside and realized I was rushing the counting and only going through the motions.

It’s time to step back and try to take an objective view on my own behavior and thought patterns. I am still convinced the disarray of my home office is a direct reflection on the mental state of my mind.. twisted, strewn about, and disorganized. 

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Written by antnp

December 12, 2008 at 8:08 am

Posted in meditation, psychology

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